Everything
by SwiftSilver
Summary: Kai's thoughts after an argument with Rei. Songfic done to the song 'Everything' by Lifehouse. KaixRei and a full summary inside.


Disclaimer: I do not own Beyblade. Nor do I own the song used in this fic. 'Everything' is by Lifehouse. :) But I think you already knew that I didn't own it.  
  
Rating: PG-13 for KaixRei yaoi pairing.  
  
Summary: Kai and Rei, having had an argument, aren't speaking to each other. Not that Kai ever said much anyway...Rei's too angry with Kai to apologize and Kai keeps telling himself that he doesn't care if Rei is mad at him or not. But, during a storm that keeps him from returning to the place his team is sharing, he reconsiders that thought. Done to the song 'Everything' by Lifehouse from the No Name Face cd.  
  
Notes: I've been listening to this CD all day and I keep telling myself that I -have- to do a KaixRei fanfic for it. But I couldn't think of a plot. So, I decided to go ahead and use the technique I use when writing my stories. :) Just sit down and let my hands do what they want. I'm liking what my hands came up with. I think they deserve a name. Any suggestions? . . No. I haven't had enough caffeine today, if you were wondering. I haven't had any. That's why I can't think. Yeah. The fic. I know. Wait. XD OMR. That's funny. I was just saving this to disk and you know how, when you first save something, it takes the first word in the document and offers that as a save title? Well, I only now realized that it offers 'Disclaimer' as the title. I write and read the word so often it never struck me as funny. That must be why I get confused when I try and save a document and it says something else o.o Anyway...  
  
Everything  
  
The first drop that hit my face startled me. Only a minute ago, the sky had been painfully blue and now it was painted a threatening dark gray color. At the time, I guess I didn't really care that it was warning me of the storm it harbored. I was so caught up in how mad I was at you. After the argument we'd had and what you'd called me, I couldn't stand to stay in the house when you were there as well...so I left. I don't even know where I was going.  
  
With a frustrated sigh, I continued on, doing my best to ignore the light drizzle that the clouds weren't able to hold in any longer. My thoughts wandered back to what had set you off...What had I said? That none of you seemed serious about your training and the tournament? It's true. Especially for Max and Tyson, but for you as well. Tyson and Max, they keep saying that they'll make up for the training they miss when they get bored in the morning and wander off. They never do. They just keep making excuses. You...You're just as bad as them. The moment you feel that you're not doing well, you quit and wander off to do god knows what. Kenny isn't ever around anymore. Off with Hillary I'm guessing...  
  
See, I start to wonder if any of you really know what we're risking going in to this tournament. The first match we lose, all of our bit beasts will be gone. Even Dizzi. None of you seem to take that seriously. But you have to. The guys we're up against...I know them. They're nothing like who we have faced before. Damnit. If you four would grow up a little, you might realize that this isn't your normal tournament! But, instead, you insist that I'm either worrying too much or not trusting you guys.  
  
It's not true. I do trust you. More than you know. Besides Tala, you're the only ones I've ever trusted with anything. And, besides Tala, you're the only people I've ever cared about. Especially you, Rei...But, after what you said to me...I'm not sure what to think...  
  
I pause as the clouds begin to release more rain and I try to figure out where I am. It's gotten so dark with all of the clouds an rain that the park around me is barely recognizable. There's no way I'm going to get back to our place before the clouds deliver the storm they are threatening me with. Shivering, I search the darkness for somewhere dry to go. After a few minutes, I find the cave that was put here for just that. For somewhere dry to go if one finds himself in a sudden downpour. Lucky me...  
  
When I reached the man-made cave, I sat down on the stone bench inside. My thoughts were occupied for a moment by the two creatures that already occupied the cave. A stray cat and a crow. It seemed that they had made some sort of agreement not to fight until the storm had passed and they could leave the cave. They were huddled together, shiver though not as badly as I was.  
  
I closed my eyes, suddenly longing to have you here with me. The longing didn't last. You're voice came back to me and caused my shivering to intensify. "All you care about is winning, Kai. Isn't it? That must be why you're with us. You just want to win. That's all that matters to you. You don't care what happens to us. Maybe you are what everyone says you are. Just a cold-hearted, selfish bastard."   
  
Closing my eyes, I drew one leg up to my chest and left the other hanging over the edge of the stone bench as I leaned on the wall. A hoarse meow made me open my eyes. The tabby cat had joined me on the bench and was sitting before me. "What?" I murmured. The cat meowed again, looking over at the crow. The crow cawed and fluttered up to sit beside the cat on the bench. I lowered my right leg from my chest and crossed my legs over the bench. The cat stepped forward and curled up in my lap, despite the fact that my pants were soaked. The crow hopped forward and perched on my knee, laying down and tucking his head under his wing. I noticed that the crow had bite marks on his neck when lightning lit up the cave.  
  
It made me think...The two of them must have been fighting when the storm started and I wondered what had caused them to stop. But that wasn't really what drew my attention...What really made me think was the fact that two mutual enemies could be fighting one moment and be companions the next...Which led me two wonder if the whole argument we'd had hadn't been pointless.  
  
Well, it was, wasn't it? Before I'd gotten frustrated with the three of you, I should have asked you why you weren't willing to train as much as you use to. But, you know me. I don't always think before I act. Or I hardly do. Hell, you think enough for the both of us, Rei.   
  
I shouldn't have gotten angry with you at all. I know you're easily upset. I think I know that better than anyone does, since I seem to upset you a lot. I wish I didn't, Kitten. I really do. I had seeing you hurt or upset...That is probably the real reason I didn't stay at the house after the argument. I knew you were hurt but I didn't want to see you that way or admit that is was my fault.  
  
God, it's cold. Why couldn't I have stayed at home...Or dragged you out here with me and apologized? I want you here with me. I need your warmth. I don't think I've ever felt this cold in my life and I don't think it's just the rain...  
  
Find me here  
  
Speak to me  
  
I want to feel you  
  
I need to hear you  
  
Why don't I just walk back now? Find you and apologize. Get it over with and forget about it. But...I don't think I can. It still hurts to think about what you said to me...Do people really think of me like that? I admit that I never wanted anyone to see me as I really am. I'm afraid of people getting too close. Only you and Tala really know me as I am. I don't trust anyone else enough to know me like you two do.  
  
Okay. I've made up my mind. I have to get back. I can't sit here and just think about you. I need to get back and talk to you. But I can't leave these two...  
  
Sighing, I slowly removed my scarf, wrapping it around the sleeping crow and then the stray cat. Both opened their eyes and looked sleepily at me. But neither objected, only fell back asleep as I covered their heads so only the crow's beak and the cat's nose stuck out. Then, holding them to my chest, I stepped out of the cave and began to try and find my way back home in the dark.  
  
You are the light  
  
That is leading me  
  
To the place where  
  
I find peace again  
  
You are the strength  
  
That keeps me walking  
  
You are the hope  
  
That keeps me trusting  
  
The storm still hadn't let off a bit after two hours of walking and I was completely soaked. The cat and crow woke up every once in a while but never tried to escape. I don't know why...For a few minutes, I thought of just stopping and standing there. I was so tired...My anger and then the storm had drained all of my energy and I no longer felt like moving. But I wanted to get the two creatures that I cradled against my chest somewhere warm. Coughing, I continued walking until I caught sight of the house where we were all staying. With a sigh of relief, I tried to walk a bit faster without tripping due to exhaustion or waking the sleeping animals.  
  
When I found the front door, I fumbled with the door knob with my numb left hand before I managed to open it and step inside. A sudden wave of warmth from the fire Kenny had started hide me and both the crow and the cat woke up. Coughing again, I shut the door and knelt down to release the two from my scarf. The cat stumbled over to the fire place and collapsed there, asleep. The crow slowly made his way over, gazing around curiously as he did so. Tyson and Max looked up at me and I wasn't sure what showed more in their eyes: dying anger or worry.  
  
I didn't stay downstairs long enough to find out. I just wanted to go to sleep. Still coughing, I made my way up the stairs and to the room we shared. Once again, my numb fingers had difficulty opening the door. Once I got it open though, I stepped in, shutting the door behind my and slowly walking to my bed. You had been sitting on your bed reading until I came in. You watched me now as it collapsed on my bed and buried my head in my arms. If you hadn't spoken, I would have fallen asleep immediatly.  
  
"Where've you been. We were worried." You murmured. I heard to setting your book aside and leaving your bed to stand beside mine.  
  
I couldn't answer though. Once again, I remembered what you had said to me and my exhaustion wouldn't allow me to lift my head and respond.  
  
My bed shifted as you lie down on you side next to me. "Kai...I'm sorry about what I said earlier...I didn't mean any of it...I know there must be a good reason for you to want us to train harder than ever. But, since you haven't told us yet, none of us are really willing to work as hard as you want us to."   
  
That made sense. It really did. You guys had always been willing to train when I asked you to since I always told you what we were training for. But, this time, I hadn't been willing to tell you what we were training for...Why? Because not even I was willing to think about it...And I didn't really think you would believe me if I told you...  
  
"Please don't think I meant what I said, Kai. I was just angry..." You whispered. I could tell you were worried that I wouldn't forgive you.  
  
Groaning, I rolled over. "I'd be more willing to forgive you if you'd just let me sleep. I'm tired, I'm soaked, and I'm freezing."  
  
  
  
You are the life to my soul  
  
You are my purpose  
  
You are everything  
  
And how can I  
  
Stand here with you  
  
And not be moved by you  
  
Would you tell me  
  
How could it be  
  
Any better than this  
  
"You're...not mad then?" If you hadn't sounded so worried, I might have told you I was. Just because I'm me. But I couldn't. Not when you look at me that way.  
  
"You're kidding, right?"  
  
You blinked your golden eyes at me before smiling. "No."  
  
"I'm not mad at you, Kitten. Far from it. I understand that you, Tyson, and Max only wanted to know what you were up against before you really committed yourselves to training...And I apologize for not telling you...I just don't really want to think or talk about it. But, I promise to tell you all tomorrow..." I told you, shifting closer in order to gain warmth and stop my shivering.  
  
You didn't respond for a moment, only smiling at me. But, when you did speak, I was reminded of why I was shivering in the first place. "Go change if you want to sleep, love. You're already going to be sick. No need to make it worse. We'll have to sleep in my bed, too, since you've soaked yours."  
  
"Shut up." I muttered, kissing your forehead before rolling out of bed and grabbing some dry clothes from the dresser near my bed before leaving for the bathroom. If I was going to where dry clothes, I figured I might as well dry my hair as well.  
  
You calm the storms  
  
You give me rest  
  
You hold me in your hands  
  
You won't let me fall  
  
You still my heart  
  
And you take my breath away  
  
Would you take me in  
  
Would you take me deeper now  
  
When I returned from changing and drying my hair, I threw my clothes in the laundry basket before joining you under the covers on your bed. Despite being dry, I was still cold. As always, you could tell even without me shivering. Smiling at me, you pulled me closer before turning the lamp between our beds off.  
  
"Good night, Kai." You whispered.  
  
"'Night, Kitten. I love you."  
  
"I love you, too, Sunbird."   
  
  
  
'Cause you're all I want  
  
You're all I need  
  
You're everything  
  
Everything  
  
o.o Please tell me I did okay on emotions there. I think it was the best I've done with emotions and I really hope you guys liked it. :) Lots of fun to write. I liked doing it from Kai's POV. It's kind of easy doing it in his POV because I'm a bit like him. No one every knows what I'm really thinking or feeling because I never care to show it. ^.^ So I find it easy to imagine how Kai might feel about things even if I have a hard time getting the emotion across. Anyway, how you liked that. Thanks for reading and please review! Oh! And maybe you should get the CD from the library or something. Hear the song. It's pretty slow for most of the song but I like how the ending sounds. The first two songs on the cd are really good as well. Hanging By A Moment and Sick Cycle Carousel. ^.^ No Name Face cd by Lifehouse. Look for it. ^.^ Later!  
  
Sick Cycle Carousel  
  
If shame had a face I think it would kind of look like mine  
  
If it had a home, would it be my eyes?  
  
Would you believe me if I said I am tired of this?  
  
Well here we go now, one more time  
  
I tried to climb your steps  
  
I tried to chase you down  
  
I tried to see how low I could get down on the ground  
  
I tried to earn my way  
  
I tried to change this mind  
  
You better believe I tried to beat this  
  
When will this end  
  
It goes on and on  
  
Over and over and over again  
  
Keep spinning around  
  
I know it wont stop   
  
till I step down from this for good  
  
I never thought I'd end up here  
  
I never thought that I'd be standing where I am  
  
I guess I kind of thought it would be easier than this  
  
I guess I was wrong now, one more time  
  
Time this is a sick cycle carousel.   
  
This is a sick cycle carousel  
  
Sick cycle carousel  
  
This is a sick cycle, yeah.  
  
;.; I don't want to wait until Sunday to type the next HoW chapter...Maybe I'll just to it now o.o No, no. Can't. Bad Swiffy. MUST. DO. WoD. MUST. DO. WOD! *Smacks self* 


End file.
